“Dearest Diary,

As I am typing this my high school reunion is in full swing and I chose not to go.

One: I do not feel like being Indiana Jones and walking straight into a snake infested pit. There are certain humans who were my “friends” but it turned out the friendship was one sided (I will dedicate a post to one of them in the future, but that will take a bit of typing as she was two faced so I do not know which face I am going to write about, hahaha, I crack myself up sometimes). This baby llama needs no drama. Just wish all the Facebook messages and whatsapps will stop – I think I am going to turn my phone off…. Damn, my battery died – sorry, not sorry!

Two: In my boredom, I have used two bottles of bleach and two bottles of hair dye so far and I still look as if a unicorn vomited radioactive sparkly rainbow glitter shit all over my head, so its best I do not go out in public as I will stand out like a sparkly twilight vampire and draw unnecessary attention to myself . I will use two more bottles tomorrow and hopefully I will look somewhat decent before my family’s party for my sister in the afternoon. I got my Dad to help me this morning and he admitted how difficult it is because my hair be long, mutantly thick and curly and I normally have to use three bottles of dye in one sitting. He says I have more hair on my head than what the entire family has combined. Of course dear father figure, the Lord gifted me with hair with a mind of its own because it mimics my stubborn sarcastic personality. Hey, if my hair does not come right, I can always rent out my services as a bright shiny beacon of hope who can light up the dark night sky – narf narf narf! Or, I will start a trend by wearing my sombreros to work – yes I collect weird hats, it helps because some people have bad hair days – unfortunately I have had a bad hair life!

Sincerely,

A medusa misfit.”

This is an excerpt from an online diary post called “Unsociable Thick Me”, from Diary Of a Misfit. The author is unknown. The writing was published on the 14th of September and was published for her viewers, whom I think are mostly around 25-30-year-olds This is a diary because the author always begins a post by saying something along the lines of dear diary. Also, I feel that the things the author writes about are more for her to talk about what she is feeling that she can’t say to people she knows, so she vents it out to this diary site. Also, She talks about the other people in her life and how they have affected her, which I don’t think people typically tell each other about, so the use of a diary as a way to vent about your problems is effective. One other thing that makes me think that this is meant to be a diary is that the author has decided to use a pen name, that way she can write about private things without people knowing who she is. 

“Ladyred: Unsociable Thick Me .” my-diary.org. N. p., 2019. Web. 5 Nov. 2019.

After a short run in the brisk morning, my friends and I decided to go to a beach to take a nice relaxing swim. We arrived at the beach, and the blue waves, with the white caps leaping over them like hurdles, before crashing to the ground came crashing into the smoothed rocks of the beach, creating an imbalanced beat that sounded almost like a drum. We quickly got ready to enjoy the beach, and climbed our way through the rocks to the water, walking past moss-covered stones everywhere, like someone went along and painted each with a masterful stroke of green. The rocks felt sharp and rough on our smooth feet, and this added challenge to the hike through them to the water. Thies reached the water first, and as he jumped in, he let out a shriek of pain, as the water was like a frozen hell. The screams almost drowned out the sound of the wind, whistling a song into our ears. Suddenly, I was at the edge of the water, and I too leaped into this adventure. I submerged myself in the frigid water, and a quick, sharp pain, overcame me. I felt like someone was ripping my arms out, and there was nothing I could do. Once we were all in the water, we decided to swim out for a few meters. The waves, constantly crashing into us made it hard to make any progress, and we eventually reached our goal, about 5 meters away, feeling like we had swum forever. As we floated there, I took a long look at my surroundings. The red buoy, that seemed miles away, standing alone against a grey, cloudy backdrop. After a few minutes, the sharp pain was getting unbearable, and we all swam back in towards the land. We arrived and quickly climbed out of the icy water, and quickly got to our towels. The towels gave us a warm feeling, but the light wind that once whistled a nice tune in our ears had turned into an angry gust, and the sharp winds made it near impossible to feel warm again.

A good main character is hard to come across. In “There Will Come Soft Rains”, Ray Bradbury has made a strong and present main character, the humans, even though they are absent physically. Firstly, on the second page of the story, he describes what the world looks like outside of the house, and how on one wall, there are charred outlines of a family. This is a form of imagery that shows that this is the effect that humans had on the world. Also, the house is sticking to the schedule of the people, showing that the technology is still serving like the people are there. For example, at 2:35, bridge tables came out of the walls, and martinis and egg-salad sandwiches were made for the people who lived at the house to enjoy, even though they aren’t there. This is why humans are the main character in the story, even though they are not present.

Bradbury, Ray. “There Will Come Soft Rains.” The Martian Chronicles, HarperCollins Publishers, 2011.

Beefeaters. Dressed like a peacock, they are the vibrantly dressed guardians of the royal crown of England. The beefeaters also give out tours to those curious enough to voyage out to the Tower of London, are an interesting sight to see. The garments of these historic guards are a dark navy blue, with a bright red lining around the edges, and the crest of these special warriors. The uniform of these protectors is a long robe, split in the front, over a pair of luminous red leggings and black boots.

These Beefeaters have interesting personalities and a fluctuating voice. Their storytelling draws you in, like the gems that you came to visit, and then leave you awed. Some of the historic tales they tell are humorous, some are somber, and a select few of the adventures they account are bound to leave you in wonder.